Enjoy Life

 



Can I ask you to take a moment, and reflect: DO YOU ENJOY YOUR LIFE?

Regardless of what answer you came up with, please ask yourself another question: WHY?

I obviously don’t know what you might have thought, but below I offer some of my own thoughts on enjoying life.

There are people who know how to enjoy life. They are happy to have a job, even if not completely satisfying, a family, even if not perfect, friends, even if not 100% reliable. People who enjoy life can enjoy small things as well as big things. They are able to appreciate a day off, a meal with friends, a nice sunset, a walk on the beach, visiting a sibling, a holiday abroad, their safe country and whatever else is going on for them. They complain seldom and seem to be relaxed and settled most of the time. They don't bring their work home, they don't lose sleep worrying about how to pay their bills or that the end of the world is coming tomorrow. It’s as if they had an 'on' and 'off' switch they press, or a great ability to park things for later. They deal with things accordingly when issues appear. 'I will cross that bridge when I come to it’ and 'I am not going to stress myself out thinking about how to do it now, because it is only a potential issue'. What is the secret to their approach? I am not talking about Saints: just about good, content people that are out there. I bet all of us know one of them. Perhaps they don’t allow the external world to dictate how they feel. Or they don’t overidentify with their problems. Or perhaps they live in the moment, and moment by moment and enjoy life. I dare to say the quality of experiencing their life is very high.

Many of us can’t do it. We stretch thin. We stress to relax. The majority of us struggle to let go of overthinking, overanalysing, worrying, making plan ABC and so on. The human mind has to magnify things and exhaust itself going through imaginary worst case scenarios. The mind is often like a dog with a bone, it won’t let go. Realistically, most of the worst-case scenarios are fantasy and never come true. What we get instead is stress, which leads to lower immunity and all sort of physical conditions. Additionally, mental health can be seriously compromised, and anxiety-based disorders can develop.  

The mind is very powerful. It can make you very stressed, but if you develop new pathways in your brain - you can be more relaxed and content or even dare to enjoy life without creating lots of stress for yourself. It takes time to change habits of thinking and acting. Recognizing that might be the turning point necessary to change in order to enjoy life more. Sometimes we need to hit rock bottom, to gain new perspective. I recommend to listen to the story told by Arianna Huffington.

There is a bigger picture to our individual enjoyment of life. The reality of the world around. Sadly, we live in very difficult times. So many bad, terrifying, difficult things are happening constantly. I read the news from Italy yesterday about their new policy and actions to do with asylum-seeking people rescued by humanitarians at the sea. It felt like suffocating. Is it possible to enjoy life knowing this? Or having to work with people who gaslight you. Or dealing with violence at home, in the community, in the country. Or knowing that due to energy prices, Christmas gifts this year are going to be lacking? Or that someone close to us is battling a terminal illness or being cheated on?

In my opinion, it is extremely difficult. Sometimes even impossible.

What is possible is to give ourselves a break from whatever difficult or painful things we have to deal with and develop self-compassion. Just to take a break. Be kind to yourself. Don’t isolate with your problems. Be kind to yourself. I guarantee that you are not the only person out there struggling with what you are struggling with. Don’t overidentify with your problems and try to see the bigger picture. Stay in the moment and try to enjoy it. Recharge. Be kind to yourself. Be kind to others. Be creative and practical. Obviously, it may take a different form for everybody. A cup of tea, watching something, talking to someone, petting a dog, going for a walk or to the gym, hugging a loved one and so on. The list of ideas is endless.

Happiness is considered a basic human emotion. I notice that people often try to ‘fake it until you make it’. The best way to start is to smile to oneself in the mirror. It is a break, not an escape. What happens is the facial expression changes, the muscles relax and the brain produces a few happy hormones. Try. Next step could be to do some grounding exercises. There is a close link between stress, anxiety and people who lost the connections to their bodies and the ground. Any relaxation technique you may choose to use will give you a break. Often, building up on small breaks can help to shift some stress and anxiety and gain a clear perspective on things and perhaps solutions. As in the Serenity Prayer: ‘help me to change what can be changed, to accept what cannot be changed and wisdom to distinguish between them’.

Faking until making it is not a way of escaping from reality. Same idea as when a person has a social, pleasant drink with others, it doesn’t make them an alcoholic. It is just a break. Be kind to yourself.

I am sharing a few ideas below. When I give myself a break, I enjoy them immensely. I hope you will too.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3STenfbpZbI 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CyKhfUdOEgs&t=4s

https://www.boredpanda.com/funny/utm_source=google&utm_medium=organic&utm_campaign=organic





 


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